He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone says I win the strip club
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize