Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize