I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
