I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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