so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
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