Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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