I like my sex mixed with concussions.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
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