Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
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This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
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