i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize