You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
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You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
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I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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