I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
