Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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