I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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