Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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