Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
‪Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best. ‬
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
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