I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Randomize
