I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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