I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
