I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
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