The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize