Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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