ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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