He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
