That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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