is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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