I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Randomize