How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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