i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
