Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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