No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
