she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I think people are normalizing furries
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
