K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Randomize
