It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize