am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
The air was thick with penises
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
