Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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