This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
