Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Randomize
