STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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