I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
