am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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