so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
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