Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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