its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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