Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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