Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Randomize