I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
