Just fell off a train. Bad.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Randomize
