i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
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