We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
