Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
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